Even though I’m largely back to myself, albeit significantly changed by the last year, things still feel kind of stilted and off. Somehow, I never really recognize a depression cycle until I’m coming out the other end.
And really, how did I not think that something like my father’s death would send me down a spiral?
I’m trying to write every day again, though I’m not ready to work on any of the novels I have partially written. I’m trying to at least put words on a page. I’ve even started a new story that I think will be a short story.
Despite the depression and grieving, both of which dialed up my agoraphobia quite a bit, I have done some pleasure travel this year mixed in with all the trips to Tucson.
My mother, brother, and I went to New Orleans in September for 8 days. We had such a great time. And, I was just back there this past weekend for some Halloween fun with friends.
This weekend I need to focus on getting some housework done, this place is a mess. It always gets like this when I’m depressed.
I’m taking a huge step next year and going to a Supernatural convention in SF. I’ve always wanted to go to one, but my agoraphobia makes it super difficult, but I’m in a place now where I can actually afford the high-end tickets and I scored a front-row seat. I both terrified and excited!
So yeah, working my way back to something that resembles a normal life.
You can follow me on Threads and/or Blue Sky and I am still on Instagram.
Photo by Kayra Sercan on Unsplash
Sending love and support to you during this difficult time.