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#amwriting Saturday

I am working on a short story this morning, a foray into the world of horror.  The story itself has been floating around in my head for years, and I figured it was time to bring it into being.

It’s another rainy Saturday here in California, and I’m still down with the cold that attacked me last week.   I’m feeling better, but as usual, the cough lingers and is slowly stripping me of my voice.

It’s hard to believe it’s March, and with the coming of March comes the time of year where my time is increasingly filled up with Pride duties.  Add in an anthology to edit and other fun and my days become filled with stuff to do.

At least it keeps me out of trouble, more or less.  Plus the day job has a lot going on this month too.  When it rains it pours.

That’s all I’ve got this morning, though Readers.  Time to get some coffee going and some words flowing.

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common courtesy

When you ride the same train every day, stand in the same spot to wait for it, you tend to get to know the people who also ride the same train every day and stand in the same line to wait for it.  You also get to know the peculiarities of that station’s particular etiquette.

For example, the spot where I wait, we line up along the yellow line, rather than from the yellow line back, because there is only a small area behind us before the bench and the wall, and when the line gets long, it can block people from getting past us down the platform.

Sometimes, we get someone who either isn’t really paying attention, or is accustomed to other ways of standing in line.  Normally, we give them a few minutes to realize where the line is, and if they don’t seem to get it, we kindly tell them where the line is.

Normally, they say something like “Oh, sorry,” and they move. Sometimes they ignore us.  This morning, there was a man who was standing behind those of us already in line.  As per our usual, one of our regulars smiled and let him know where the line ended.

His response was borderline hostile.  He said, “Who cares?” and took a step closer.  So we tried to explain the reason the line was formed to the right, and he continued to be aggressive.  It didn’t matter what we said, all efforts to be polite and friendly led to him getting angrier and angrier until he finally cussed at us and told us we “better just drop it,” in a threatening tone.

When the train finally came, he parked himself in an accessible seat, put on a pair of sunglasses and ignored anyone and everyone.   The whole encounter left me feeling crappy, so I stopped into Starbucks and picked up four coffees (because I couldn’t carry more than that), then handed the cashier my Starbucks card and said to use it for the next however many people the balance would cover.

On my way out I loaded up with creamers and sugars and went on about my way to work, gifting coffees to the first four homeless people I came across.  By the time I got to the office, I felt so much better. I hope someone buys that bitter man a coffee today, or otherwise gives him a kindness that will improve his outlook.  Six AM is far too early to be that angry already.

Happy Wednesday, Readers!  Kindness Matters!  Pass it on!

Photo by Charles Forerunner on Unsplash

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telling stories

When I was still in high school, someone from the church we were attending found an old typewriter and had it cleaned up and repaired and I found it under my Christmas tree.  We were barely making ends meet, and with little money left over for gifts, my mother had reached out to the church for help.

I had a head full of stories, it seems that has always been true.  And suddenly I had a way, beyond my terrible handwriting, to tell them.  It was an amazing gift, one that likely changed my life.

I wrote my first “novel” by hand when I was thirteen or fourteen.  It was truly awful, and a rip off of every science fiction movie or book I had read. But, it started something in me.  My friends read the hand written words and clamored for more.  The sequel to that first awful book was the first thing I wrote on that typewriter.

I’ll admit, it was a heady feeling to be met at the school doors before homeroom by four or five people wanting to get the next ten pages.

I learned a lot through that experience.  I learned to translate my thought processes differently.  I learned about plot development and foreshadowing.  I learned the joy of having readers who loved my work, even when I broke their hearts.

None of the novel length stories I banged out on that typewriter were any good, but that didn’t matter.  I was a writer, and that, as it turns out, wouldn’t change even as I aged.  I am quite a few years past that Christmas and those stories.  My head is still filled with plots and characters and words.  I still work at putting them down on the page, though my paper is now digital.

Best Christmas present ever?  Maybe so.  It gave me so much more than just a tool.  It gave me confidence, joy…it sparked a passion that still burns inside of me today.

The rain is really coming down outside my window, and the wind is howling on this cold Wednesday afternoon.  I think a cup of coffee is in order, and a start to the work day.  I hope you are all safe and warm, Readers.  Fill your day with kindness, and reap the joy it brings.

 

Photo by Camille Orgel on Unsplash

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breaking through

Happy Saturday, Readers!  I hope that you’re safe and warm and out of all of this crazy weather!  Here in Northern California it’s been very wet and colder than we’re used to, making for good times to stay inside with a good book and a cup of tea.

I’m now a week + out from my surgery and healing is progressing well.  I’m up to walking a full mile, which means it’s time to go back to work.  I’m also writing again for the first time in quite a while, working on a short story for an anthology that benefits a writer’s conference I will be attending in October.  I will also be editing that anthology in the near future.

If you want to follow my weight loss journey, I invite you to follow along in my blog devoted to that: aweightyjourneysite.wordpress.com.  It is likely I will stop talking about it so much here.

It feels good to have broken through the writer’s block that’s been plaguing me, and I think turning my attention to something new was a big reason I finally got through it.  I’ve only got a vague notion of where this story is going, but it’s built on a character that has been kicking around the back of my brain for a while.  It’s also a foray into true science fiction, which is always a fun playground.

Wishing you a cup of your favorite hot beverage, the comfort of a favorite blanket and some really good reading material!

 

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

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where birds fly free

It’s an early Saturday morning, early enough that it’s still dark outside.  I can hear the gutters still draining off the steady rain of the last few days and every now and then, a gust of wind. It’s a nice sound, especially because we have needed the rain so badly.

I’m waiting on cover options from our designer for Where Shadows Fall and working on the next project, but for today, I am taking a break to go watch some birds with my mother and a friend (who incidentally is the woman I modeled the character Victoria around in the Shades and Shadows books).

We have a number of ecological preserves and wildlife sanctuaries or refuges around us, and while I may not know the names of every bird we will see, I’ll enjoy watching them and spending time with two women I adore.  It is a chance for my camera to venture out and take some shots, like the one above, which I took at the Woodbridge Ecological Reserve a couple of weeks ago.

It’s nice to take a break from one creative endeavor for a different creative endeavor.

Right now though, I’m sipping my morning coffee and contemplating breakfast. I hope your Saturday is everything you need it to be, Readers.

And, if you’re shopping for the reader in your life this small business Saturday, consider any one (or more) of my books, found here.

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#amwriting

I’m sitting in my home office on a Saturday morning, enjoying the last bit of the Death Wish Coffee before I get my next shipment later in the month, and writing.  It is maybe my favorite day of the week, especially when the words are working well.

Today is one of those days, when the words are working and the story has changed enough that my re-write of existing words to change from 3rd person to 1st person has become writing fresh words that take the story in a slightly different direction.

My main character, my point of view character is an eleven year old girl when we first meet her.  She got her name when one of my best friends responded to my naming dilemma by telling me to name her Fred.  She was being facetious, but I took the suggestion to heart.  Her full name is Alliafred, but those close to her call her Fred.

The world she lives in is different from anything I’ve published before, and I’ve been really enjoying create a map of that world, though I lack in the drawing skills and naming skills.  I’ve been working on the world’s backstory for years.

In other news, I’m told to expect Where Shadows Fall to be ready to publish before the end of November, and as soon as I can, I will share the cover with all you.  I’m very excited to share this story with you to close out the Shades and Shadows series.

Now, however, it’s back to the coffee and the words.

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taken a-back

There is this moment, just as I am waking up, but before I’ve moved or opened my eyes.  In that moment, nothing hurts, at least not above my baseline.  I try to hold on to that moment, because I know that soon, I’ll have to move, have to sit up and put my feet on the floor, and then the pain will come.

I sometimes joke that if I ever woke up not in pain, I’d assume I died through the night.  I’ve had chronic pain conditions most of my adult life, and I’ve developed new ones as I’ve gotten older.

Most days I can be functional with a few coping mechanisms, some gentle stretching and my meds for nerve pain.  I’m fortunate to not need anything in the opioid category for pain relief.

This morning, as I slowly became conscious and I hung there in that glorious moment when nothing hurt, I wondered what it would be like to be there all the time, to have my body back.  I’ll probably never know.  I just adjust to the new normal each time something new comes to claim my body for its home.

This week has been rough for pain levels.  My lower back, and in turn my legs, have been extra loud in the symphony and have required I do some babying and icing.  They seem to be somewhat better today, though my whole back is a hair above what I call “normal.”

That’s okay though.  Today is a writing day, and aside from getting some laundry done, I have no other plans.  Just me, some Death Wish Coffee and one of the two stories I’m currently working on.

What about you, Reader?  What’s on your plate today?

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early morning San Francisco

I’m the first one in the office, which isn’t unusual.  Outside my window, the sun is starting to show itself between the buildings and the cloud cover.  I’ve worked from home for the last two days, and my house is not in a good position to watch the sun rise, so this is a nice treat.

I thought I’d talk a little bit today about books I’ve been reading.  Recently I finished From Unseen Fire, by writer Cass Morris, who I met at last year’s Sirens Conference. It is her debut book, and if you like well researched alternate history, this could be a good choice for you.  I’ll admit that the frequently flipping points of view made it a little difficult for me to get into at first, but her writing draws you in and you can see the research she put in before writing.  Beautifully drawn characters and a believable alternate Rome made this a solid four star read for me.

There can be no surprise that I had There Before the Chaos in my hot little hands the day it released.  My love for K.B. Wagers’ writing has been a long term affair, and this follow on to her debut trilogy was intense.  I tried to take my time and savor it, the way Hail savors her favored blue chai, but it went by all too fast.  Political and savvy, this first entry into the Farian War trilogy drops us in on Hail Bristol in a rare moment of peace, but peace was clearly not meant to last.  Kickass characters, heart stopping action, heartbreaking emotion…it’s a whirlwind.  You need to get in on that whirlwind and go for a ride. It gets a solid 5 stars.

One of the things that brings a book up to a five star experience for me is world building.  I can tell when an author has put in the hours to create a world I can crawl into.  It’s something I strive for as I write.  Both Wagers and Morris did this very well.

It looks like the day is starting here as people keep coming through that door, so I should refill my coffee cup and buckle down.  Happy Wednesday, Readers.  May it be filled with small pleasantries and deep kindness.

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living off script

Life is an odd thing, if you think about it.  You’re born a squirmy, screaming thing that can do nothing for itself.  If you’re lucky, you’re cared for by people who love you just because you share the same blood.  You grow and you choose friends based on the clothes they’re wearing or the TV shows they watch or the color of their hair or whatever random thing makes them attractive to you.  You learn skills, you set yourself off on a path to earn a living, and maybe make your own squirmy, screaming thing that you then have to love and care for.

It’s almost like we’re born with a script to follow…even if some of us don’t follow it all the way.

Today is my mother’s 70th birthday.  She followed that script.  She became a nurse, she got married, she had two kids…but then there was an unexpected twist written into the script when she wasn’t looking.  She found herself divorced with two kids to raise with nursing skills so far out of date that going back to nursing wasn’t even possible.

She raised two kids, one who seems to be following the script pretty well. He married, raised two kids to adulthood, etc.  Me, well, not so much.  I kind of walked away from the script a long time ago. I never married, though I considered it once.  I never had kids, though I considered that once too.

At my age, it isn’t going to happen, though I have considered fostering from time to time.  I get attached too easily and I’m driven to fix things for others, so I think it would probably kill me to do.

I’ll have to settle for living off script, I guess.  It isn’t a bad life.

I have a cup of Death Wish coffee and some edits to get to before I head out to see Mom.  Happy Saturday, Readers!

 

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observations on a wednesday morning

I hopped on the early, early train this morning, the one two trains before the one I normally take, because I got to the station so early. It always surprises me how full the train is at 5:45 am.

When I stepped onto the train, I could see construction workers, half asleep, some squatting on their toolboxes, others sprawled across seats they’d managed to find before the train got full.  There were glassy eyed medical workers in their scrubs, blinking blearily out the window and kids on their way to daycare, mostly asleep in their parents’ laps.

There were a couple of college students too, trying to read from textbooks as the train jolted this way and that, clinging to the overhead straps to keep themselves upright.  A few stops in, two older women got on, each with a cane and looking like a strong wind would knock them over.  We had to rouse two able bodied folks sleeping in the accessible seats to make sure they could sit down.  It was one of those mornings where four accessible seats on each end of the car wasn’t enough for those who needed them.

I read most of the ride because I can’t resist the call of a new book.  At my stop, I got off the train with the masses and shuffled along to the escalator, praying that the escalator to the street was working because my right hip just is not up to stairs right now.  On the concourse I could see the homeless that had slipped into the station for a bit of warmth, sleeping while they could.  They’ll get roused soon enough and be forced to move on.  At least here in San Francisco they don’t have to worry about freezing temps and snow as they do in some places already this year.

Because I was early, I didn’t pass the regular people: the guy who looks like he belongs in a mob movie, the pregnant woman who is always on the phone, the homeless guy who sets up just in front of the one Starbucks, hoping for a cup of joe from a kind stranger.

Construction has the street all torn up, traffic re-routed, as they build whatever “pedestrian improvements” they’re making.  Closer to work, the striking workers were already hard at it outside the Courtyard Marriott, some of them blocking the side walk and chanting incoherently, others standing around the table where the coffee lives and talking.  I considered stopping at the Starbucks there, but then I remembered that they were closed due to the strike.

I was early enough that the usual security person wasn’t at the desk yet, so I nodded good morning to the man I don’t know and headed upstairs.  It was quiet and dark, the automatic lights weren’t due to come on for another 15 minutes…but I like it that way.

Now, however, the sun is up outside the window and I’m no longer alone in the office.  I guess that means I should refill my coffee cup and get busy. Happy Wednesday, Readers!  May it be filled with kindness.