Tag: coffee

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pick a peck of pickled peppers

There are times when even an introvert agoraphobe needs some human connection, even if that comes in the form of socially distanced socializing. Yesterday I went up to my mother’s house for some of that human connection, and for an exchange of money for a monitor and home baked bread for some peppers harvested from their garden.

We spent some time not touching or hugging, while I crocheted and my mother and brother and I watched some news, talking about the happenings around us and just generally remembering what it is like to have people around.

I should have been in Austin this weekend for our annual shenanigans with Steve Carlson, but it has been pushed out to October due to the plague currently ravaging our country.

But, having gone out to see Mom and David and the nieces, I came home with a new tv/monitor to replace the one I have on my desk that is dying a slow death and I have a bag filled with poblano, dragon and jalapeno peppers that I need to decide what to do with. I’m actually contemplating an attempt at pickling some jalapenos. I know the dragons will kick up my chinese dumplings a fair amount, and I may try my hand at drying some of them because I have more than I can use before they’ll go soft.

Now that I have that new monitor, I’ll be spending time in this office today, clearing the desk, pulling the tower out to clean and make set up easier and getting everything set back up. But first, I’m spending some time writing (I’m currently working on a Sci-fi short story) and drinking some Death Wish Coffee.

I hope you and yours are safe, Readers, and I wish you a pleasant Sunday!

Cover Photo by Nick Artman on Unsplash

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a flower for your friday

This week has been an odd one. Yesterday did not feel like Thursday, in fact at one point I thought it was only Tuesday. On the other hand, I’ve gotten a lot done, and this morning I was half convinced it was Saturday when my alarm went off.

Here in California we are locked back down due to the surge of covid-19. For the most part it doesn’t bother me. I had hoped the virus would be controlled enough to go to Austin at the beginning of August and Disneyland at the end of August, but both of those things are not happening.

And boy-howdy do I need some attention to my hair! I had an appointment next week with my amazing hair person, but salons are among the places shut down again.

Work has been busy, and will continue to be for the next little while. But, I’m learning Markdown as I work along, which is a cool thing. You know how much I love learning new things!

Speaking of work, I should get on that. (Title and image have nothing to do with this post). My coffee’s getting cold. Happy Friday, Readers!

Cover Photo by Jordan Newsom on Unsplash

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slow Sunday mornings

Is there anything better than a slow Sunday morning with coffee and cuddly kitties? I even managed a little bit of a sleep in. I mean, I was awake at 5:30am, but managed to hush my mouthy cat and go back to sleep for almost two hours. It was lovely.

So much of life right now isn’t lovely, so it feels like these little things matter all the more, you know?

It seems like everyday the news gets worse and worse, and there’s so little we can do about it. Here in the US we never completely broke the back of the first wave of this corona virus, and now we’re getting slammed by the second, or maybe just the revenge of the first.

The more we discover about how this virus attacks the human body, the scarier it seems.

I know I’ll breathe easier once I get paid on the 1st. I’ve been without money for so long, and it just presses in on all the rest of the anxiety. It’s significantly less money than I was making before, but I will never have a daily commute, so that’s a plus. I imagine that once the current economic environment improves, so will my pay.

So many people have it harder that I feel bad for feeling bad for myself, which I know is ridiculous. This isn’t a competition, and none of us need apologize for how we are feeling.

How are you doing, Readers?

Cover Photo by Mike Kenneally on Unsplash

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to all the dads out there

A lot of people have complicated relationships with their fathers, and I think current political and health matters probably don’t really help in that arena.

I have LGBTQ+ friends whose fathers have thrown them away, disowned them, told them to never come back. I have friends who had abusive fathers, drug addict fathers, fathers who were too young and too afraid to stick around. I know people who never knew their fathers, and never had a male father figure step into their lives to fill the void.

But I also have friends who had amazing dads or stepdads or granddads who did what dads are supposed to do, who loved those kids and helped them grow up in a world designed to tear them down. Those who taught them how to ride a bike, bait a hook, stand up for themselves and for others. Those that knew the world outside of childhood could be could and cruel, and helped prepare them to thrive anyway.

I was fortunate, even if my relationship with my father has occasionally been rocky due to so many reasons that are rooted in who I was in my puberty years (think far-right, evangelical Christian) and who he was (as in, not that), that my dad was there for me. We don’t always agree, even now that I’ve gone the far right of him to the far left of him, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loves me for who I am.

My Dad and Me

And I had a pretty cool stepfather too. Bob and I didn’t always see eye to eye either, but he was always there to lend a hand when I needed it and he loved us even if he never said those words.

I hope that all of you who fill those roles, whether you’re blood or not, take a little time today to give yourself a moment to know you are awesome. And if you are someone looking for how to help the next generation, whether you are cis-male, trans-male or nonbinary, consider finding that one on one relationship with a kid who needs it, and yeah, I don’t just mean the under 18 crowd. There are tons of folks in their 20s who could really use a father figure to help them find their way into what being an adult really means.

Even if you’re one of those guys who never really had an old man, maybe especially if you’re one of those guys, be the father-figure you wanted in your life.

So Happy Father’s Day to all the Dads and Dad-adjacent folks out there. Being that it is Sunday and my job #2 has no work for me to be doing today, I get to write for a while before I get on with the housework that needs doing. I’m off to do that…and drink more coffee.

Cover Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash

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black lives matter. period.

There seems to be a sense of expectation hanging in the air, at least here for me. Some of that is the fact that after months of unemployment, I will be starting not one new job on Monday, but two! I pretty much won’t have a life here for a while, but neither of them pay what I’m accustomed to and combined they might just let me climb up out of the hole I find myself in financially.

Add to that confirmation that an event I had been looking forward to in August is still happening (at least at this moment…who knows what the future will bring…but it IS in Texas, so…yeah, no idea how that will affect things), and I am cautiously hopeful.

With so much wrong in this country right now, with death and dismay all around us, it feels good to have something to look forward to. But, we have to remember, this pandemic isn’t gone. And, we are sure to see spikes in the numbers going forward, with so many bodies out there protesting, with businesses opening, with so many people just acting as if now that we have a new threat, the old one is gone.

People are still dying of this virus. Which in no way means that I do not support the protests or my black brothers and sisters. I totally understand their choices, because if your choice is a slow, agonizing death or a fight to prevent senseless, violent death? I’d choose the latter every time.

I wish I had what it took to be out there with them, but I’ll be honest, between my agoraphobia and my immuno-compromised system, I break out in a cold sweat just looking at the pictures on my TV.

My new jobs will help me stay home too, since they’re both work from home. It means a lot of stuff I might normally be doing gets put on hold, such as writing. Today and tomorrow might actually be the last few days I have to get words out of my head and down on paper for the next few months.

So I should probably get on that…and make more coffee! Remember, Black Lives Matter. Kindness Matters. Love Matters.

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a plan for the day

There comes a point in every book where I want to chuck it all in and never write another word.  I start to question my plot. I start to think my characters are crap.  I become fairly certain that the whole thing is a steaming pile of garbage left to rot in the sun.

Thankfully, a few days away from the book is usually enough to cure me of it, and then I fall in love with my characters again. I plug up plot holes.  I draw maps to make sure I’m using consistent language and direction when I’m writing about travels.  I fortify character descriptions, using sensual language to really let the reader see the character. I read through the book, making notes on things I need to thread deeper into the story, and then I go back to the beginning and I edit.

I hit the first point the other day, as I was finishing my first edit pass on The Blood Witch. I was pretty sure I was just going to toss it, and the year or so I’ve spent writing it, in the bin and stop calling myself a writer.

This morning, as I sit here sipping my coffee and contemplating my day, I’m reaching the second point.  I know where my holes are and I have good ideas on fixing them.  I have a list of little things I want to carry forward because I wrote them in with good intentions, and then forgot about them completely. I have a deep abiding love for my two main characters, and character notes on how to improve the secondary and tertiary characters.

My one remaining quandary is that my narrator main character is witty and fun in the first half of the book, but some of that bleeds off in the second half.  Part of it is due to the circumstances, and that will remain. But, I know that when I am under stress I get more sarcastic, not less, so I want to work on building some of that back in.

So that is the mission I will embark on today.  After the coffee is gone, the garden watered, breakfast eaten, for at least two hours today, and every day this week, I work on filling in the gaps and making this book something to be proud of.

Of course, then the real work happens because it is time to start querying.  Which is vaguely terrifying.

So, off to do those precursor things so that I can get to the words.  Have a pleasant Monday, Readers.  Stay safe.

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and the edit will go on…and on…

I’ve been working all week on my first edit of The Blood Witch. I’m up to chapter 25, which is where I will be starting this morning.  I have so much love for this character. Well, all of them, honestly.

I need to work on establishing some of them a little more, make them stronger side characters with stories all of their own…you know, make them real.  This is particularly true for some of the main character’s family.

As I work through this and build up the weak spots, plug up plot holes and all of that, my muse is already spinning up the world building for the second book, because, yes, this is at least a two book series.

I’ve added over 5,000 words so far, and there are probably another 2,000 to 3,000 to come, which should drop me close to 90K by the time I’m done tinkering.  Then, provided I have the cash, I will be hiring my favorite editor to give it a good going over before I start the terrifying part: querying agents.

Having never done it, and having perpetual impostor syndrome, the thought is terrifying. I think these characters deserve my best, however, and I aim to give it to them…and the best is not just giving it to the publisher you know will take it, but won’t do much to support it once it’s out in the wild.

So, that’s how I’m muddling through the week, Readers.  That and coffee.  Lots of coffee.  Maybe that’s why I’m vibrating?  How about all of you?  How are you hanging in there?

Fancy a bit of “virtual hang out” time with me…and whoever of my friends happens to show up?  I’ll be hosting a Zoom meeting this evening.  No pressure, just a chance to see faces and chat.  I’ll put the details in the Events section over there on the right, or you can check my FB Author’s page for the link.  We did it last week, and there may have only been a few of us, but we had fun!  So come join us!

Okay, coffee’s getting cold so I’m off to slurp it down and get on with that editing business.  Y’all stay safe out there!

Oh, and if you’ve missed any of the Read Along for Through Shade and Shadow, you can find the recordings on my You Tube Playlist.

Cover Photo by Christin Hume on Unsplash

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the earth awakens

Hey there, Readers!  I hope this Easter Sunday finds you well and in good spirits.  I haven’t celebrated Easter in over 20 years, but I have many friends and family who still do.  I have a complicated relationship with Easter, to be honest.

Living alone, as I do, and not having kids around has done a lot to reinforce the “out of sight, out of mind” aspect of what Easter was for me as a kid, then a deeply religious Christian, then an aunt with small nieces.  Once the kids were old enough to not really care about the Easter bunny and all the attendant hoopla, the holiday just sort of faded from prominence for me.

However, this time of year is so full of rebirth and the absolutely amazing way that nature wakes, making food grow out of dirt, decorating our environment with flowers and greenery, and that is certainly something I can celebrate.

This evening, I plan on celebrating in my own way, with a tasty adult beverage, and reading the second chapter of Through Shade and Shadow over on my Facebook author’s page.  If you missed the first chapter, it’s loaded up on my You Tube Channel, and I’ve put it here for your happy viewing.

I will link them all in a playlist to make it easier for y’all to watch in a continuous stream.  If the weather stays nice this evening, I may even move this chapter outdoors.

I’m knee deep in consolidating feedback from my beta readers on The Blood Witch, and once I have it all noted down in my printed out copy, I plan to do a slow read through it to mark up with my own notes/additions, etc, before I bring it back to the computer.

I really love these characters, and I can’t wait until I can share them with all of you, though that might be a while, as I plan to do the “query” fun to maybe find an actual agent to represent me, because as much as I appreciate my current publisher, I am ready to move beyond what they can provide.

In the meantime, I’m sure we can find other stuff to keep you entertained.

Did you know I have an Instagram?   To help relieve my own boredom, I’ve started an impromptu photo project with a Porg named Joe and his good friend, the Child from the Mandalorian.  The hashtag #theadventuresofbabyyodaandporgjoe will take you to their shenanigans, though I missed tagging the first few.  (Yes, I really am that dork).

Okay, on that note, I should get my day going.  My edits are staring at me and my coffee’s gone cold.  I should probably think about eating something too.

I hope you have the best day. Stay safe, stay home and wash your hands!  Love you all!

Cover Photo by Sebastian Staines on Unsplash

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it’s okay…to not be okay

Earlier this week, I was feeling great about the possibilities of getting a job offer today.  Late yesterday I got an email saying that, like the last three jobs I felt sure I was going to get, the job has gone on hold while the company re-evaluates what they genuinely need.

To some degree, I’m used to it, as a technical writer. But, I have to admit that this time, it’s hitting me pretty hard.  The job boards have the same ten jobs or so that they’ve had for a month.  Everyone is re-evaluating.  Jobs are getting really scarce.

Earlier this week I was feeling pretty optimistic and I was happy to reach out to my extroverted friends, and read poetry on Facebook and help people get through this.  Today I’m feeling fairly hopeless.  Today I’m afraid.

Logically, I know these things come in waves, but I also know that we haven’t seen the worst of this.

I need to pay bills.  I need to pay rent.  But at the same time, I’m afraid to spend anything because I’m so unsure of when there will be more money.  If I spend nothing of my last unemployment check, or of the next two unemployment checks, I will just make my rent in May.

On Tuesday, I have an interview at Target to work overnights stocking shelves because it pays slightly better than unemployment, yet at the same time, I don’t want to take the job from someone who might need it more than I do.

I know we’re all in the same boat.  We’re all doing our best to keep that boat afloat in an ocean of uncertainty and fear.  And I know that I’ll find my optimism again, but for today it’s okay to not be okay.

I’m going to finish up this coffee and wait for the recruiter to call me for a remote tech writer job I heard about late yesterday.  Maybe this is the one?

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this is not the dystopian future I imagined

Hello, Readers!  I hope you are all taking good care of yourself as we isolate ourselves and hope this virus situation doesn’t get any worse.  I’m trying to stay optimistic, but I’ll admit it can be hard.

It’s so weird to see the traffic map completely green!  I’ve been in the SF Bay Area for twenty years, and I’ve never seen it before!  My town, which is normally filled with people out walking is a ghost town.

As someone who has read a LOT of dystopian stories, I’ll admit, when I considered what our future might look like, how our society would fall apart, I did not have my money on virus-caused-economy-crash.

So, how are you occupying your time, Readers?  I hope you have coffee and good books to read.  I’m still job hunting, and in a time like this there are still a lot of job postings, but not so much with the hiring.  It’s going to get worse before it gets better, so remember to wash your hands, stop touching your face, and take care of one another.

This crisis can make us better people, if we let it.  It is already helping out Mother Earth.  Check in on the elderly and vulnerable in your neighborhoods, and remember to keep your distance.

Meanwhile, I have a short story to write and a novel to start editing.  Hopefully some more editing work will be coming my way soon.  Happy Friday, my friends.

Photo by Jeffrey Blum on Unsplash